Domme Spotlight Interview

How did you discover the world of FemDom and what attracted you to it?

I was a sugar baby for a while and I didn’t like the way the men treated me. I wanted to be in charge, I wanted to be the one calling the shots sexually. That’s when I started experimenting with being dominant in the bedroom and found out I liked it. I really liked it. I heard from the grapevine about some clip stores and began researching. It wasn’t until I got my first obedient pay pig that I got really hooked. The power exchange was intoxicating. I loved transforming him into someone needy, subservient, constantly horny. He loved giving me absolutely anything I wanted. It was a beautiful relationship. Still is.

How long have you been a Domme and have you noticed any differences in the industry between now and when you first started?

I’ve been around for almost two years and I can’t notice much difference. It’s the same stuff with different faces and names. There’s always going to be issues and mountains we have to climb, especially with all of society against us. I don’t know, I guess the only difference I’ve noticed is the influx of only social media existing BDSM which doesn’t really bother me, it just clogs up space & makes it harder for people who actually know and enjoy what they’re doing to get noticed and find each other. But I want anyone telling me what to do so I won’t tell another what to do either – unless they want me to ;)

What are some of your most memorable moments as a FemDomme?

Oh man… I’d say my most memorable moment was last year when I finally told my best friend/sort of significant other what I did. I showed him a video of this guy busting his nuts between the toilet seat and cushion. He laughed. Then I told the guy who’s nuts it was about it and he absolutely lost his mind. He wanted to submit to my boy and together we started coming up with weird shit to get this guy to do for us. It was so sexy and fun. Another time was when a sub noticed me in public and got me a case of beer. Nothing more really happened but it was neat to get noticed.

Please share one factoid about yourself that your subs and fellow FemDommes may be surprised to find out.

I used to do gymnastics but stopped because I wanted to figure skate instead, of course in doing this I witnessed a little girl’s finger get run over with a skate so I don’t do that anymore. BUT these two sports have gifted me with incredible flexibility which I still keep up via Pilates and yoga-esque stretches though I alter the positions so I can’t really call it 100% yoga haha.

What are some things you wish you knew about being a Domme before you started?

Boys come and go and so will the money. Don’t get hooked on a moment or a connection, ever. Don’t give boys the benefit of the doubt. You don’t always have to be the “nice” guy but you do always have to be the diplomatic one, losing your temper over something temporary won’t do anything but hinder progress.

If you could change one thing about the FemDom industry, what would it be?

Definitely the fetishization of black people, and all poc really. It’s kinda messed up how people only want you to degrade themselves if they’re white. Can’t white people stop thinking about black people as opposites to them for like one second? It really gets upsetting when dudes are constantly calling me a light skin queen and telling me to degrade their white balls and asking me about BBC. It’s REALLY annoying. I don’t let it get to me as much anymore but i would DEFINITELY prefer to be seen as an equal. Not a fetish. Also I wish it was easier for black people to have the same success as typical skinny blonde women – nothing against those women of course. It’s nothing they’re doing, it’s the audience perpetuating social norms and Eurocentric beauty standards.

What are your favorite fetishes to indulge in with your subs?

Definitely cuckolding and SPH. There’s nothing sexier to me than being desired so deeply by a submissive male and him being turned on by the idea of me being with someone more sexually pleasing to me than he is. And if financial domination is on top of that – a total wet fest haha. Teasing is fun as well. You know, pretending I’m gonna flash a guy my goodie bits and pulling my pants or bra back up at the absolute last second leaving him confused, rejected and frustrated. So. Sexy.

Do you have any least favorite fetishes and why?

I’m not a huge fan of home wrecking. I understand if a husband isn’t getting what he needs from his wife in the bedroom so he comes to me in secret, that can be kinda hot – but outright bashing his wife and actively trying to ruin their marriage isn’t my thing. I’ve tried it and it just feels… icky. Or telling him to sabotage any of her stuff, I’ve really been asked this before – guys asking me to make them cum in her shampoo and stuff. Really gross stuff.

Outside of FemDom, what are some of your hobbies?

I play guitar, sing, play video games, and I USED to skateboard but now I don’t thanks to an incident involving a vodka bottle and a lost penny board. Alright I’ll tell you, I was skating around and I busted my ass on the sidewalk with some vodka in my backpack. It spilled everywhere. I’ve had beef with the board ever since. I’m thinking about getting an adult razor scooter type though and joining a scooter gang. I’ve seen a few around Chicago and I’m good with the skater kids, they’d be my squad.

Does FemDom actually turn you on? If not, what does?

Oh my word, yes. Nothing like a guy submitting to me and confirming the power I knew I had inside all along. The more that happens the more the natural confidence in me grows and I’m able to do what I do even better. When he doesn’t question me and does whatever I tell him to entertain or turn me on, there’s nothing better. Someday I want an actual cuckold situation perhaps with a live in slave and a boyfriend or something. That would be so hot.

What are some of your turn offs?

Greedy, bratty boys. I’m so honestly sick of guys who think their dicks are gifts and I’m supposed to bow to it because what…? It hangs so disgustingly? I’m only attracted to a penis if I’m attracted to the man himself, so when a guy thinks he can change my mind just by continuing to be an arrogant prick toward me I get immediately turned off. Sweet boys are always more my type because I’m sweet. Even when I’m telling you to do nasty, slutty things for me, you can hear bunnies and angels in my voice – maybe even get a giggle out of me if you’re particularly desperate and quivering for me. Oops I’m talking about turn-ons now. ;)

Describe your ideal slave / sub.

My ideal submissive would be a sweet, nerdy boy. He’d be into horror and SciFi, we’d play DnD together and maybe even play some borderlands. He’d work endlessly to pay for anything and everything I asked him to, and in return I’d be able to openly be sweet to him and we could form a genuine friendship outside of D/S. But in real life you can’t give these guys anything, they’ll start trying to walk all over like morons. So I can’t be nice. That’s what I’d like, someone I can be nice to who wouldn’t see that as a flaw in my code. I can be nice and the boss at the same time. Watch me do it.

What could a sub do that would please and/or impress you the most?

Be rich and generous. If he’s not rich, then do everything he can to be so for me. I want to be his motivation, his muse. Someone who has no problem stepping up to the plate for me, I wanna bring the best out of someone. Get a raise, sell his things, donate plasma, work out, become someone I can actually be proud of FOR ME. Now THAT would be impressive. Sorry I keep saying ‘his’ by the way, I just find dominating men sexier because they piss me off the most.

What is your favorite aspect of being a FemDomme?

The connections I make along the way. Yeah, every submissive that comes along doesn’t have the most interesting personality but every now and then one does – and we actually become friends. Yeah, he messes it up every single time and I have to let them go but at least we had what we had while we had it. I’d love to hold on to something like that forever, but I’m not afraid to drop it if I have to too.

Please comment on how you feel about performing in clips, on cam, and in person. Do you offer each of these? How do you feel about them?

I offer each, yes, but each is a different level of intimacy with me. Clips, I LOVE THEM. I get to mess up as much as I want and I can just edit the final perfect project together and sell it for however much I feel someone should sacrifice to witness. On cam? Slightly different, I can move the camera anywhere I want on my body. I can make him move the camera and do whatever I want him to do. It’s different because I have to actually stay on my toes and in domme mode in the moment – I like that too though, it forces me to think on my feet and be swift about my smoothness which is always extremely necessary. I don’t wanna lose my touch ;). In person? This is a rare occurrence. I don’t meet with submissives I don’t already know and trust and a lot of them scamper off without a backbone before they meet half of my expectations. They’re sexy, exhilarating. Sharing that energy with someone, smelling the sex, sweat, and fear in the room, it’s my favorite out of them all but I guess that’s why it’s gotta be so rare.

Is there anything else you’d like to say to the DommeSource audience, to both fellow Dommes and subs?

Uhhh, whatddup. I’m Miss Harley Queen aka thrasherbrat and I’m a wild child and that’s okay. Be yourself, don’t let anyone tell you who you should or should not be unless it makes you happy to do so. And for some, it truly makes them happy to do that and they push that away – go ahead and give in. Be who you are meant to be. Chase your passion because in the end what else do we really have in this life? Thank you for your time and attention, I hope to get your cock up and locked up real soon.

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