Sub Spotlight Interview

How did you discover the world of Female Domination / submission and what attracted you to it?

It all started when I was far too young to know what was happening or why it was happening, and even today, I’m still not entirely sure what the appeal was in the beginning. It was probably 1993. I was 8 or 9 years old and I would routinely watch movies I shouldn’t have strictly been watching. Total Recall was one such movie.

There’s a scene where Sharon Stone orders some hired goons to hold Arnold Schwarzenegger in place. She kicks him in the balls and then knocks him out, looking imperious and dominant in a business suit as she does it. And as I was watching, I remember feeling… something. Down there. I didn’t understand fully what that something was at the time, but that was my initial discovery of what I would later come to know as “female dominance”, or “femdom”. And I knew even back then, that I liked it.

How long have you been a submissive? Are you a submissive in “real life” as well or do you switch?

I guess I’ve always been submissive. I don’t think submissiveness is necessarily a learned/developed trait. I’ve always thought of it as being more akin to sexuality, something that’s hard-wired into your psyche from the start. And then as you get older, you develop fetishes that feed into that. I’m not a psychologist though, so could be way off.

That said, most of my relationships and romantic entanglements have been decidedly vanilla.

Are you a slave to any Domme? If so, explain why you serve Her.

I am unowned. At present, I’d class myself more as a casual submissive/fetishist than a lifestyle submissive or slave.

What are your most memorable moments, as a submissive?

I’ve not really had any moments that I’d truly call submissive moments. As mentioned above, my prior relationships have been pretty uniformly vanilla. This is definitely something I’d like to rectify in the future though, either by being more open and honest about by my fetishes and submissiveness with romantic partners, or plucking up the courage to session with a pro-domme.

What is one thing you wish you knew about FemDom/submission before you started?

That I’m not alone in feeling the way I feel. That there are literally millions of people who share the same fantasies that I do. That it’s not something to be ashamed of.

Are there aspects of the FemDom industry you wish you could change? If so, what are they?

I think society as a whole has come along way in being more accepting of kink and sex workers in general. But I still think we have a way to go. I’d like to see us completely eradicate any and all stigmas that surround sex and sexuality, and those who make a living in that industry.

What are your favorite fetishes and why?

I have a huge foot fetish. And then from exploring my foot fetish, I’ve come to develop fetishes for well worn socks, shoes, sneakers, etc. I think being naturally submissive maybe ensured I was pre-disposed to liking feet. When you crave being on your knees at the feet of a dominant woman, I guess it stands to reason you’d come to associate those same feet with sexual desire.

I like that foot worship is effectively a distilled version of femdom in and of itself. What could be more submissive than worshipping the very lowest part of someone as they literally look down on you?

What are your least favorite fetishes and why?

As long as it’s safe, sane and consensual, I don’t have a problem with any fetishes, really. There are plenty that don’t interest me personally (anything involving bodily fluids, anything involving food or vore, smoking fetish, sissification, adult baby, etc. etc) but I wouldn’t judge anybody who is into those things.

In “real life”, do you consider yourself successful? In other words, were you born a sub or are you a sub by choice?

In some areas of my life, I feel successful; in others I probably fit the archetype of a “loser” pretty well. Early 30s, single, relatively low-paying job, not much in the way of savings… but I’m happy (mostly). I’m in the job I’m in because I enjoy it. I have a good social life. I may be biased but I’m of the opinion that I have some pretty cool hobbies – going to gigs and festivals, playing guitar, playing computer games, etc – and I’m fortunate enough to get to enjoy these things regularly.

Describe your ideal relationship with a FemDomme.

I think my ideal relationship with a FemDomme may well be a pipe dream sadly. That said, if I could wave a magic wand and magically get everything I wanted in a relationship, then I’d be romantically entangled with a dominant woman who was happy to make me her bitch in the bedroom but could view me as an equal outside of it. And there’d be lots of foot rubs. Basically, I’d like to have my cake and eat it too :P

What is your favorite aspect of being a sub?

Being easy to turn on has its perks. A pair of soles, some dirty socks, a little bit of verbal humiliation… it doesn’t take much to make me weak, and feeling weak is always a welcome feeling for a submissive.

What do you look for when looking for a Domme? Are there any special characteristics that you look for?

Someone who understands how the mind of a submissive works and is happy to indulge in my kinks. Someone I’m drawn to physically, but more importantly someone who can engage me mentally. And someone who can do all that and still treat me with respect.

Is there anything that a Domme does or could do that would turn you completely away? Or, if you have served a Domme before and left, why did you leave?

Not respecting boundaries or consent would be a sure-fire way to turn me away completely.

Do you partake in online sessions, clips, or in person sessions? Which are your favorite and least favorite and why?

Mainly just clips so far. There are so many talented and beautiful dommes out there now making quality clips in just about every genre a submissive could ever wish to explore. And I promise I’m not just saying it because this is her site, but Empress Mika has very quickly become one of my very favourite clip producers. Her foot fetish clips in particular are fantastic. Her perfect feet, mixed with her penchant for seemingly effortless humiliation is a combo I don’t think I’ll ever tire of.

Is there anything you would like to say to the DommeSource audience, to both fellow Dommes and subs?

Subs: Know that you’re not alone feeling the things you feel and wanting the things you want.

Dommes: Thank you. I can’t overstate how valuable the work you do is. Your work literally has the power to improve the quality of life for so many people. What you do is practially a public service and we’re lucky to have you.

Of course, you do! Fill out the request form here and maybe you will have the honor.

There is a separate section for subs to interview, with the primary goal of showing Dommes a peek into the minds of various subs. Fill out the request form here and maybe you will have the honor.