Domme Resources

The art of female domination can be very intimidating to a newer Domme looking to learn how to master it. I’ve put together some useful tips and tricks that I felt were useful to Me, back when I was learning to perfect everything.

For me, it was important to pick a domination style that really was a natural part of My personality. It makes being a Domme much easier if it is not largely just an act.

For Dommes that decide to fake it, that’s okay too, but I believe this to be harder. Perhaps faking it is best for you because you like the separation you feel from your personal life, for example, and this makes sense. Keep in mind though, that you will most likely need a lot of breaks and time to re-charge yourself. This is because you will burn out much quicker, especially if you are doing FemDom full time.

You should pick what works best for you. However, it is always my best advice to pick a domination style that is as close to your real personality as possible. If it’s your real personality, even better. I do believe this makes things easier and more seamless.

This sounds pretty obvious at the surface but, for some reason, this may get kind of lost when it comes to FemDom. Remember, you absolutely cannot be the perfect Goddess for every single sub.

For example, some subs enjoy a cruel, mean, harsh and merciless Domme. Other subs enjoy a more teasing, sensual Domme while others enjoy a bratty, spoiled Domme.

It just isn’t possible to be the Domme that can do all of these aspects perfectly for every sub. So, do not stress yourself out and stick to the Domme that you are. There are many different styles to choose from so always pick the Domination style/personality that feels the best to you and most natural.

It seems that, part of the excitement for subs is that you “read their mind” so to speak. This requires you to pay attention to the hints they gave you and respond accordingly. Refining this, of course, takes practice but will become easier and easier as time goes on.

A few things to look out for:

• “Should I…”
  When a sub asks you if he should do something, the answer is almost always yes. For example, “Should I eat my own cum?” Haha, he most likely wants to eat it but wants you to tell him to do so.
• “I don’t want to…”
  Here again, when a sub says he doesn’t want to do something, he most likely wants to do it, but just wants you to tell him or “make” him do so. For example, “I don’t want to eat my own cum…” He most likely does, haha.

Now, of course, this all doesn’t apply when you are discussing hard limits or if you can reasonably sense he really doesn’t want to. Always follow this with common sense and a grain of salt.

• “I’m such a loser for doing this…”
  Tons of clues can be found in their language, especially self-degradation statements like the above. Every time you see a statement like this, you can be almost entirely sure the sub would like you to elaborate on, confirm and acknowledge this, in his words and your own.

These were just a few examples, but always be on the look out for hints subs give you and use that to enhance the session.

This also comes from a bit of time and experience but always be confident in yourself and your decisions. If a session goes a bit haywire, there’s no reason to stress over it. Many subs know that you’re not perfect and not a mind reader. Perhaps it just wasn’t a match? Perhaps it was the subs lack of communication? Or, perhaps it was because of mistakes you made that you can now learn from.

Check out my How to do FemDom Online article. It is especially useful for those Dommes that are completely new and need a starting point.